another Christmas Eve. Just another day in my world. I’m working, pet sitting (lots and lots and lots) and still having (another) one of those days. No special dinner tonight, no traditions tonight, nothing different tonight. Just me and my dog. I don’t even have a tree up. I need to pick up normal things from the store, not holiday things, like toilet paper and soap but every store will close early or have a line around the block.
Don’t get me wrong, i used to love Christmas. When i was little, i loved the electric candle light in my window and the glow it filled my room with. I loved the advent calendars and decorations my mom had for me each year. The “around the world” advent was the best, with pictures and facts about Christmas in different countries. I think my mom has since thrown it away. I loved the red fuzzy fox ornament i somehow aquired and wanted to keep with me at all times, which is now stored away in a box somewhere. I loved waking up early to sneak downstairs and take a peek at what Santa left under the tree. I loved checking my stocking and playing with the new toys i got. I’m thankful for that and those memories.
Today, though, everything is different. Everything is so materialistic now and Christmas isn’t about memories or family. It’s about buying a lot and out-doing other people’s gifts or last year’s events.
Tomorrow i’ll get to spend time with some of my family for at least a few hours, and i’m so grateful for that. But today i’m still living like every other day. There’s no significant other to travel with or start new traditions with. There’s no Christmas Eve dinner by candlelight. There’s no spending the night with the parents and taking off work. It’s just me and my dog in my small apartment in this small college town that has become a ghost town since the kids are gone. I’ll be wrapping some presents, washing dishes and most likely playing video games.
Call me the Grinch, but this time of year isn’t particularly easy for me, and i’m sure isn’t easy for other singles either. Even though i made the choices to be where i am now, it’s still hard nonetheless. I am just grateful that i do have family close that i can visit. Some may not even have that. So remember while you’re relaxing by the tree with your loved ones this evening and opening that first gift, some people are still alone for the holidays and it’s not easy. Just take time to be thankful for what you have this season. I’m thankful that my dog and i can keep each other company as Santa makes his way around the globe. Because, after all, he is the “someone” in my life right now and like i’ve said before, without him, i’d be lost.